[ Before anything else, Bakugou would probably feel that it is extremely important to point out that he waited a long ass time before doing or saying anything about the weird trainwreck that the finals of the sports festival turned into. He stewed upon it. He thought and pondered extensively. For weeks. And for him, that is actually quite a show of commitment, and also indicates that he actually thought to himself that his kneejerk reaction might not be the most appropriate reaction. Character development is beautiful, basically, and okay — so maybe he thought it would make the whole "we're dating but we don't talk about it explicitly, ever, because honestly what the fuck" situation a bit awkward and reduce the amount of making out they do. So he has ulterior motives. Whatever, character development is still beautiful.
After weeks, though, he concludes that his kneejerk reaction was almost definitely the most appropriate reaction. His pride? It was offended, horrendously so, and it demands for justice. He wants vengeance, and also a proper victory, if he's going to keep the stupid medal and all.
He also doesn't want to cause property damage that he'd probably be held liable for if they went full-on fighting with their quirks in the streets, because (1) he is not rich, and (2) that seems like the kind of stuff that goes on your criminal record, which wouldn't look good for his future budding career. (Not that his future budding career is looking great in the first place, when his claims to fame include getting attacked by a sludge monster and then getting muzzled on TV, and hopefully too children weren't watching that because how would an appalled parent explain that, really?) As such, he's forced to wrack his brains over how he can get a rematch that appeases his ego without becoming a public nuisance.
Tl;dr: this was a disaster before it even began. But what else is new.
But the shorter recap of how they got to where they are goes something like Bakugou going full-on grade school bully and making sure that when he approached Todoroki with this brilliant plan, it was in front of the entire class. There was some weird egotistical and mildly Freudian grandstanding, the gauntlet was thrown down, and the phrase "come at me like you want to kill me" was unironically used. Kirishima commented about how manly it all is. Midoriya looked moderately concerned murder is going to be committed down the street from where he lives. Iida looked like he wants to somehow be the responsible guy and intervene, but didn't know how. And on the inside, Bakugou knew that Todoroki was probably regretting for the umpteenth time ever associating with him, but feelings are feelings and pride is pride. He is emotionally stunted, but has enough pride in his left pinky as most people do in their entire bodies.
It makes dragging Todoroki over to his house a somewhat more awkward affair than usual, because Bakugou has expressed a desire to casually kill or be killed at some point (literally dragging, as in he clamps onto the tail of Todoroki's blazer and refuses to let go of it in case he tries to stage an escape from his fate, which would be kinda cute except it's Bakugou). He gets the feeling that Todoroki only lets it happen because there's a part of him that wants to believe Bakugou is just kidding, or will be persuaded out of this really fucking bad idea.
He will not be moved by logic. As far as he is concerned, his home is merely a pit stop to drop off his school bag before they go attempt to beat the shit out of each other, only just letting go of his deathgrip to do just that before turning around and giving Todoroki an expectant look. ]
So.
[ A dramatic pause ensues, to build the suspense, or something. ]
You're not gonna half-ass it, right?
[ Please Bakugou, he probably hasn't even agreed to this stupid idea yet. In which case, Bakugou would be doing worse than property damage. He would be performing straight-up homicide with intent to kill. ]
[ It was a novelist of some varying repute who once said We all fear what we do not understand, and never before have those words been quite so apt. They have an understanding, an arrangement as it were, one where Todoroki is his stoic-ass self, Bakugou is his homosexual-slash-sadomasochistic mess of a boyfriend, and they both do their absolute best to ignore how they're actually in a relationship. It's a pretty fair system, occasional bout of warm fuzzies aside, means they can both get on with things without having to break out of their emotionally-stunted shells, focus on more important things like falling into depravity together.
Which brings us to the issue at hand, the sports festival. He'd known from the minute they were up on the platform, eyes the world over on them while Bakugou thrashed like an upset puppy, that this couldn't possibly end well. He'd lose his cool, scream himself hoarse over him throwing the match and, in the worst-case scenario, this sham of a relationship they have going on might even be at an end. Chilling stuff, I'm sure you'll agree. But, whatever, he'd prepared himself for the worst, made his peace with whatever heroes worship, and settled down for whatever Bakugou might dish out. So, naturally, one can imagine Todoroki's surprise when... well, nothing happened. Sure, Bakugou might've been a tad more aggressive than the norm (outlandish as that sounds) when they got home that night, but in the end it all amounted to a big fat load of nothing.
Not that Todoroki was about to complain, of course; he wasn't exactly in the best of places emotionally after that fight, didn't have it in him to offer Bakugou anything close to an explanation, and so if he wanted to let the matter drop, Todoroki was more than okay with that. Except of course this is Bakugou and letting the matter drop is completely alien to everything he is. He's not going to buy any crap about character development either; he's become painfully familiar with the other boy since this whole mess started, despite his best efforts to the contrary, knows all too well by now that Bakugou doesn't need an excuse to lose his shit, has as many triggers to his temper as there are definitions of the word jigger. The source of his worry, then, because suddenly Bakugou was breaking away from his understanding of him, breaking the routine they've set up, and now the issue of waking up with a knife in his gut became a serious concern.
So, sad as it sounds, he's actually quite happy when Bakugou decides to call him out in the middle of the school day, means he can finally stop fretting over where the hell this is going. Nor does the whole mention of killing each other really faze him, because some part of Todoroki is in fact painfully aware of how close they've both come to dying lately, just as another, distinctly-larger part of him is totally okay with that. Bakugou's still a fucking idiot for coming up with the idea of course but, well. In other news, people die when they are killed, and when people use their legs they move faster!
Meaning, yes, he lets himself be dragged along, not entirely sure where this is leading but already knowing it'll be nowhere good. He could try to escape, of course, is pretty sure he can get away without a scratch, but the fact of the matter is that he wants whatever issue has Bakugou ass-angry this time off the table so they can go back to how things were before, uncomplicated. Which means folding his arms at that question, wondering how he can possibly respond. ]
You're serious, aren't you.
[ Of course he is. His consent was probably never even part of the equation, for that matter. No, they're just going to beat the shit out of each other for no apparent reason to sate Bakugou's inflated sense of pride. Possibly because, that's right, he's in a relationship with a guy who's gay and a sadist!
My dumbass boyfriend can't possibly be this weird. ]
And if one of us ends up dead?
( got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire )
[ Yeah, as if Bakugou thought it through that far. Is it that surprising, though, when Bakugou would probably describe his type as "somebody who could possibly beat the shit outta me if they really wanted to and I was not prepared", as if that's a normal preference which you could put on a Tinder profile without getting a left swipe from 100% of people. ]
And yes, of course I'm serious. [ He seems mildly offended this is in question here, although he's pretty sure this is more of a "do I have to" type complaint anyway. ] You can't call winning against somebody who's half-assing it an actual victory.
[ Thus the need for them to wail on each other until Bakugou is satisfied. To be fair, this has nothing to do with their weird relationship status, Bakugou can compartmentalize that much to an acceptable degree, and even he could sense that there were other things going on at that moment. (Maybe he thought that saying "Look, I literally don't give a shit about your circumstances" was going to help mitigate the circumstances somewhat. In a shocking twist, it did not.) The problem here is what are words and how do you communicate; also, why is it not acceptable to engage in a bit of fisticuffs to prove physical superiority?
Basically, Bakugou has never felt the need to bring up or into the dynamic they have established anything that has more than one degree of separation from the both of them. Todoroki's family-based emotional problems? That is a whole two degrees, sir. It'd be different, maybe, if Todoroki brought it up himself — he'd probably listen to it, stare really hard at the wall behind Todoroki's head, and then attempt to communicate that he honestly doesn't give a shit about the behind-the-scenes fuckery but he does, in a roundabout way, give a shit about the fact that it affects Todoroki. What a great partner; nominate Bakugou Katsuki for boyfriend of the year 2k15. ]
I didn't earn it. That's all.
[ He has no idea if he's even remotely getting his point through but whatever, he's dropping his stuff on the floor and stalking off to his room to change clothes. If he's going to die or kill somebody, it might be a bit of a hit to Yuuei's reputation if he does it in their school uniform, and more importantly, he may as well be comfy as they do this battle royale thing. ]
[ A battle royale implies something on a grander scale, perhaps, than two exceptionally dumb boys beating the everloving shit out of each other. He's not entirely sure how the headlines would handle that one, nor does he particularly care. In much the same way, really, as he's not sure when Bakugou's utter inability to comprehend anything more complex than man, I'm so amazing went from a reason to avoid him to actually kind of endearing. Todoroki only wishes he could be so single-minded. Until he sees Bakugou manage to ram his foot in his mouth yet again and remembers just how lucky he is.
Truly they are a match made in heaven. ]
I give, you win. Happy now?
[ Todoroki, unfortunately, does not see the appeal in a quick spot of recreational violence - but all the same, he can appreciate that Bakugou has a problem, seemingly inconsequential as it is, and that Bakugou's problems, much as he'd prefer it were not the case, are it is in turn his problems. He enjoys the informality their relationship, how the leave their issues to one side (even if Todoroki is relatively certain that his boyfriend, he with all the capacity for empathy of a teaspoon, doesn't have issues to speak of anyway), and so he'd really like to avoid this, much as he knows that's a bad idea. He can't bring himself to admit that he might, in fact, care about Bakugou to a far greater extent than he actually shows, but he can admit to being emotionally invested in their relationship, and so things that concern Bakugou by part and parcel concern him.
They're both fucking masters at being obtuse, basically. But it means he's not saying no. ]
I'm not seeing what I get out of this.
[ Even if he is, in fact, following the other boy to his room, doesn't give a damn about what Bakugou might think as he throws off his blazer. There's an unspoken agreement being proposed here, the acknowledgement that, if he's going to provide Bakugou with the bloodbath he so desperately desires, Bakugou should in turn try to attend to his needs. Most couples would be able to just sit down and, y'know, talk about these things, but communication was never their strong suit. ]
[ Bakugou really politely waits for Todoroki to take his blazer off before promptly shoving him against the nearest wall and — he's going to have to explain later why there are scorch marks on the wall now, but first things first. ]
Wrong series reference aside, Bakugou seems legitimately pretty upset about that response. There's something more to it than just him not getting his requisite amount of blood and bruises, but a superiority-inferiority complex gone to hilariously horrible extremes. Not nearly as bad as the superiority-inferiority complex that poor Midoriya "I swear I wasn't hiding my OPness from you for years" Izuku accidentally gives Bakugou, but still, bad enough that Todoroki staking Midoriya out as a rival makes Bakugou decide he needs to obnoxiously insert himself in there to remind everybody that heyho, the King of Explodokills is pretty awesome too and are you looking down on me you piece of shit? You're looking down on me, aren't you?!
But again, haha, communication, etc. — Bakugou has done 200% better of a job articulating his feelings about this to Todoroki than he has to anybody else, and he's still making a shitshow of it. ]
Look. It's, like... different, okay? When I'm looking at you as an opponent, it's not like how I normally am looking at you.
[ Oh god he tried, he did try. He tried to hard to say "you're still my boyfriend and I still lolilove LIKE YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT". ]
Also, if you don't do anything, I'm gonna punch you in the face in five seconds.
[ HE DID TRY. ]
( you are the weapon i chose, these wounds are self-inflicted )
[ He did. He tried so hard and Todoroki isn't sure what to make of that. Glad that he made the effort, maybe? Bakugou's still a mystery to him - a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a load of bullshit, for that matter - but Todoroki has some idea of what it's like to feel desperate, unable to get his feelings across, in part thanks to a wave of Deku-induced character development. He's still reeling from it, even, starting to think about the path he'd set himself down, the one that felt like the only option he'd been allowed, realise just how foolish that'd been. He's not going to claim a change in perceptive is the cypher he needs to make sense of whatever the fuck goes on in Katsuki Bakugou's head, but it means he's willing to make a few concessions. Accept there are still a few things they still can't get across to each other.
Also this would of course be followed by You're really cool, Bakugou and the question marks they would be everywhere.
It probably says a lot for the nature of their relationship that Todoroki is not in the least bit concerned to find himself pressed up against a wall, staring Bakugou down - this is how 90% of their romantic encounters go, he'd have to adjust eventually.
Also he's not touched by that sentiment at all, shut up. ]
I'm not going to pretend I understand.
[ So instead he's just going to grab both of Bakugou's shoulders, make like he's about to kiss him, and crash their foreheads together.
#winning ]
( infect me with your love and fill me with your poison )
[ Those protag-induced character development arcs, man. Bakugou didn't ask for this kind of self-awareness. He could've been happy to be an asshole with no self-awareness forever, but no. Now he's an asshole with very limited self-awareness. He even cried like three tears and those are tears he can never take back.
Anyway, he's not going to admit that he was taken slightly off-guard by how familiar that gesture is, but he definitely takes a moment longer than he really should've required to react. Luckily for him, Bakugou is naturally hard-headed, so he largely just winces and makes an attempt to throw Todoroki's hold so he can back off to a safer distance to regroup. He just got nailed in the forehead. He looks really pleased. ]
See, that's more like it.
[ So change of plans, now they're just going to go hand-to-hand in Bakugou's house and hopefully there isn't anything particularly valuable or sentimental that could become collateral damage. Why would Bakugou care about his dear old grandma's heirloom when he needs to concentrate on making good on his promise to punch Todoroki in the face instead? Because he's a grade-A violent person with personal issues, the fact that they're in a relationship they don't explicitly discuss doesn't stop him from putting his full weight into it, either. ]
[ There are so many things they can never take back, like Todoroki's No, I'm serious... I probably have a secondary quirk called Disarm or something..., adorable a line as that was before the scanlators got their hands on it. And let us not forget Bakugou's recent development, being shunted into the sidelines with a fancy haircut and tighter jeans while the new main trio grew ever closer and took the limelight, usurping his role because the universe apparently just loves shitting on Bakugou Katsuki.
Though Todoroki distinctly feels that it's the other way around, because Bakugou looks far too happy with himself after that blow, like a pleased cat, and so the throbbing pain that's broken out across his forehead feels very much not worth it. ]
Let's just get this over with.
[ Easier said than done, because Todoroki was never one for CQC - as a certain Teenage Mutant Hero Turtle will later observe - relies pretty heavily on his quirk when it comes to combat, meaning the arm he raises to block that punch doesn't shield him from much of the blow, throws him back. And this is why, head ringing, his immediate response is to try and return the favour. ]
( are you brave enough to let me see your peacock )
[ And just to add to his existential pain, Midoriya jacks his moves for like what? The fourth, fifth time now? Maybe Deku's got a secondary quirk too, "Copycat (Only Applies To Kacchan)". He should join forces with Uraraka and reclaim plot relevance, but only one of those two people deserves it and there's no prize for guessing which one that is.
There's no response to Todoroki's comment; the adrenaline's already rushing and he's mentally in the zone (no laser eyes, though), not wanting to waste his breath on trading snarky remarks at the moment. Even Bakugou has enough in him to realize that it is definitely highly abnormal, the extent to which this sort of thing excites him, how strongly it is that this is driven by instinct.
If Bakugou had stopped to think about his plan, he probably would've realized at some point that he picked one that advantages him without particularly meaning to, when he's better at short ranges and relies on his (fundamentally really gross) hero costume to give him the assist at longer ranges, but it has been well established at this point that thinking was not something that went into this plan. This time, he's expecting the retaliation and shifts back to catch some of the momentum of the blow, taking the rest so that he can stay close enough to hook his foot around the back of Todoroki's ankle and attempting to sweep him off-balance. ]
[ And by now Uraraka has already taken back her place in the spotlight and Bakugou is still just a joke. This is leading up to the eventual timeskip, a la Oda, where legendary washup Baron Explodokills has been reduced to playing Mineta's sidekick. Meanwhile Deku realises he had an innate quirk all along and that he's even better at blowing shit up than Bakugou is.
But yes, one of these days Todoroki is going to realise his boyfriend basically has two giant buckets of his own sweat strapped to his arms and this will be a great tipping point for their relationship. For now, however, he's content to watch as Bakugou slips into DA ZONE, perhaps trying to ignore just how alarming being faced with that expression is. There's actually something a little captivating in it, Todoroki decides, almost pure, how he lets his bloodlust overtake him and puts all else aside.
Or that might be him making excuses for why the sight of Bakugou looking about ready to kill him where he stands is actually kinda hot.
Instead it's a matter of how there's no attempting to sweep him off-balance at this point, because Todoroki's experience with combat has never been this hands-on and besides, he's never thought about having to fight without his quirk. Which means he goes down like a ton of bricks with very little struggle at all, manages to force himself forward and throw a punch at Bakugou to try and drag him down. ]
( YOU'RE HOT THEN YOU'RE COLD YOU'RE YES THEN YOU'RE NO )
[ Remember how even when he was supposed to sound mildly unhinged and ready to blow up a building to teach poor Midoriya a lesson about his inferiority and then the fan scanlations decided he should use a meme because on a meta level there's an element of beautiful, poetic justice there. Even when he's not supposed to be a joke, he's still a joke. No wonder Horikoshi thought to himself, "Man I need a new rival character."
It probably goes to show just how much Bakugou should seek therapy that at this point, he's so singlemindedly focused that Todoroki manages to punch him squarely in the jaw and drag him down to the floor but he barely registers anything except the taste of blood in his mouth and a half-formed thought that he thinks he may have cut his inner cheek on his teeth. Instinctively, he rolls with the motion, uses gravity to ensure that he comes out on top and — this is kind of familiar, just in a different context of when one of them has their knees straddling the other's waist. And just in case Todoroki ever, for some reason, thought that Bakugou wasn't serious about the whole "I think attempted murder is reasonable in the course of this fight" thing, rather than settling for something tamer, like maybe grabbing at the neck of Todoroki's shirt and yanking him up, he just goes straight for the stranglehold, fingers curling around Todoroki's neck as he tries to force his chin up.
[ Truly we are blessed that the scanlators understood in a flash just how much of goddamned memelord our rival character is. At some point Bakugou will be replaced by his beta 'anyone can do it if they try!' design and absolutely no-one will notice, so diminished his actual role in the story will be.
What else is new. Bakugou is at all times like thirty seconds away from being in dire need of therapy.
More important is the feeling of Bakugou's face beneath his fist, and lucid as he is it's hard to deny the triumph that brings, a half-second of satisfaction before he finds himself falling. He might've just crashed the back of his head against the floor hard enough to earn a concussion but really, it's hard to focus on stuff like that when he finds Bakugou atop of him, fingers wrapped lovingly around his neck to make him choke. That sort of thing really does wonders for making him give up on the whole rational thinking thing, blood rushing to his head to drown all else out, makes him bring his hands to Bakugou's arms and dig nails in deep to pull him off.
Possibly also grinding up against him, he'll admit. It says a lot when the victim of child abuse from a loveless marriage is the sanest one between them. ]
( my boy, he ain't the one i saw coming ) (it counts she was featured)
[ In a twist of fate, what is this newfound plot relevance Bakugou Katsuki has and will he be able to retain it for more than like. Two chapters.
One would think that a prominent hero academy would have some level of interest in having its young and brightest seek some therapy for all those issues, but what? What what?? Proper adult supervision in my shonen mangas? Get outta here. Bakugou is working out his feelings via violence, and there is nothing wrong with that, he feels.
Still, even he would have to admit that there's probably something severely wrong with the heady rush he gets from this; he can feel the blood rushing and he's hyperaware of Todoroki, even down to the smallest movements — he doesn't allow his senses to miss a thing.
He hisses a little when he feels nails digging into his skin, but he's too pumped with adrenaline to fully register the pain, so it doesn't occur to him to shake Todoroki off by moving his arms, jerking them away, nope. Right now, the logical processes in his brain are informing him that clearly, clearly the best way to get him to stop is to adjust that chokehold so that he's pressing upwards a little more, putting pressure on the softness of where the bottom of the jaw meets with the neck.
— aaaaand there we go, there's the fightboner we all knew was coming. Congratulations, Todoroki, on being choked by an asshole who pops one in the middle of a brawl. Life never really goes as expected, does it. ]
[ How bizarre... Bakugou is taking centre stage again, getting screentime and dialogue and even more chances to show just how much of an asshole he can be, and now it's just a question of how long it'll take him to accidentally murder All Might in this exercise.
And given that the proper adults' response to Bakugou and Midoriya's mess of a relationship was forcing them into a combat situation, he might actually be onto something there. Or at the very least, Todoroki's definitely working through something right now, feels they'll have grown as a couple by the time this is over. If he lives that long, that is.
The problem with Bakugou's hands tight around his neck and the threat of impending death hanging over him is that it makes it rather difficult to think, and so while Bakugou becomes aware of near every motion he makes, Todoroki's view is already starting to shrink, faded edges at the corner of his vision as instinct overrides all else, forces him to focus on the important things - how he's about to die here. Lack of oxygen notwithstanding, thoughts so well-planned and complex as even I'm so fucked are beyond him now, every urge in his body screaming out that most basic of edicts: Kill or be killed.
Unfortunately, he's not quite yet at Bakugou's level, the point where using his quirk becomes instinct, and so it's with a choking noise that Todoroki tries to force himself up, clawing at Bakugou's neck with one hand and aiming a punch at his face with the other, captivated by the sound of blood pounding in his ears and that primal need to bring Bakugou down.
Which also means he's, ah. Grinding up against his boyfriend right now, accidentally building up friction. Could be a little unfortunate. ]
[ I want to laugh but I can't because man I can't even write out the possibility that Bakugou is going to accidentally gut poor All Might right in the war wound without realizing the depths of what he is doing and we're all going to look on his line about All Might looking down upon him with an uncomfortable laugh.
Bakugou's practically ready to become a counselor now, if really all that's needed to work out intrapersonal issues is to fight it out! He can suggest ever more creative ways to beat the ever loving shit out of each other. "What doesn't kill you makes your relationship stronger or whatever," he'll say. "Oh, your arm's broken? That's too fucking bad. You should break that other guy's arm in retaliation."
The first thing that Bakugou registers is faint confusion that he can taste blood, and then he realizes that the reason his mouth is a bloody mess because he keeps ripping up the inside of his cheeks on his teeth. After that is the realization that he just got thoroughly punched in the face, with enough force to distract him from what he was doing (choking his SO to death) and loosen his grip, but not enough force that his dick remembers that hey there, little buddy! We were doing a different kind of one-on-one here!
The I want to fight instinct is really not fundamentally incompatible with the I want to get off on it? instinct to Bakugou, but he seems momentarily distracted at his priorities here. Fight first, get off second? Get off first, fight second? Por qué no los dos?
After another second or two of this intense inner debate, he both internally and externally declares: ] Oh, fuck it.
[ One is probably not supposed to get off on grabbing one's boyfriend by the shoulders and attempting to roll him over onto his stomach, knee pressing into the small of his back and rudely pressing his face face to the floor, hand half on Todoroki's cheek and partially on his neck, but as we have well established here: Bakugou's an ass man and if he's going to get off on this, he's going to do it so thoroughly that when Todoroki gives him shit for it later, he can close his eyes and think okay that's fair but it was also fucking awesome so. ]
Edited (emdash, eacute, close enough i guess) 2015-10-06 03:07 (UTC)
[ And yet, in a shocking swerve! Flashbacks to when our heroes were tender children, Bakugou being absolutely adorable in his youth, co-operation between protagonist and rival! Bakugou puking and drooling all over himself, inspiring us to sin. How hype were we all at Bakugou Katsuki: THE ORIGIN.
The worst part of course is that Bakugou's half-assed methods - resorting to violence, burying his issues to then take them out on the general populace, predominately just being an abrasive asshole to everyone he meets - somehow keep bearing fruit, which on top of being goddamn infuriating, probably means he's never going to get any better. Which shouldn't really be a problem, because Todoroki's never been a big fan of that whole i can change him bullshit from his sister's romance novels (Anne and Marilla had this discussion about a century ago and it was old then), but he's seriously starting to wonder how Bakugou will actually handle adult life.
Or y'know, he would be, if not if not for the very real reminder of his own mortality staring him dead in the face. There's little room for thoughts like i think i might seriously be in love with the guy trying to choke me the fuck out in a head deprived of oxygen, funnily enough! Every bit of processing power Todoroki has is being directed into breaking free, thrashing under Bakugou and building up friction, precisely the wrong thing to do in this situation (but really, was there ever a right thing).
He doesn't get a lot of time to appreciate that loosened grip, unfortunately, manages maybe one quick gasp before Todoroki finds himself being pinned to the floor, air-starved limbs not exactly suited for putting up much of a struggle. If he was in anything approaching his right mind right now, he might actually have noticed that his boyfriend's somehow managed to pop a fucker boner during all of this when the damn thing rubs against his leg, but alas. Forgive him for not realising Bakugou's assicition was going to play into their fight to the death.
But now is not the time to be questioning Bakugou's weird preoccupation with sexualising his body (no, there's nothing at all sexual about him, not at all. what do you mean unintentionally lewd). ]
The fuck are you—
[ Todoroki gets about that far until he decides to just enjoy his newfound ability to breathe, panting perhaps just a little to heavily as he tries to angle himself off the ground, push back against Bakugou to get his face out of what's proving to be a surprisingly comfortable floor. Where the fuck is this going, Katsuki. ]
[ So many bodily fluids coming out of Bakugou's body, like pride and saliva and bile and pride and tears and pride. Literally I could not have asked for much more, every single origin chapter has been a true work of fanservice and we all eat it up furiously while begging for seconds.
Bakugou never wanted to go to hell for being a lustful bastard. A prideful bastard, sure, he would have taken that and said "okay. Fair." He could even see wrath being the sin that tipped the scales. But this is a direction he never foresaw coming — if he were the type to be more inclined towards justifying these sorts of decisions, he could probably pull some cool semi-legit psychological/biological facts out like "well you know in a life or death situation your base drives kick in and remind you that your entire purpose of being alive is to procreate and so it's like totally normal to pop one in a fight" — but he's not really inclined towards that thing, for one, and more importantly he would be all too aware at the sheer amount of bullshit coming out of his mouth. Popping a boner during a fight, that's sort of justifiable. Popping a boner because he thinks his boyfriend's hot and Bakugou sexualizes the hell out of his body, that's probably just part of being a hormonal teenager. Deciding to take the opportunity to purposely seek getting off during a fight, that is...
It would take a lot of professional help for Bakugou to unpack his issues is the nice way to put it, probably.
And where the fuck is this going indeed. Bakugou makes an exceedingly strained noise at Todoroki pushing himself back against him because fuck his life, fuck his physiology, fuck everything that is making him think this is a really great idea despite the very small voice of rationality squeaking as loudly as it can THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA! STOP RIGHT THERE!! — the better conscious he thought he'd killed off years ago.
It sounds kind of like Midoriya's voice (all it's missing is a vaguely tearful kacchan!!!), which is probably why Bakugou doesn't listen and instead casually places either knee on each side of Todoroki and
touches the butt like we both knew he would. Okay, "touch" is really an understatement. "Manhandle", while more accurate, is still somewhat kind. This is like on the level of 'has this guy literally never touched a boob before, or does he think that it's going to disappear if he doesn't put his entire life force into it?' in bad straight porn.
He senses Todoroki about to give him shit despite only just regaining the ability to breathe and decides that ahahaha nah, he is not about that lifestyle today. It's not a very comfortable grip he has on Todoroki's neck, though, and consequentially there is very little finesse put into distinguishing between "enough force to make sure he can't talk" and "well, it'd be like the third or fourth or... fifth time I joked about Sex Sent Me To The ER" over the course of X many months. ]
[ I can't believe Horikoshi is bringing all of my fanart to life, truly we are living in the best of times. All of that development for Bakugou and Deku's not-quite-childhood-friends-but-close relationship, the way they feel about each other. Bakugou still being forced to swallow his pride in every panel...
Todoroki supposes he should be thankful that his boyfriend's sunk so much thought into which particular circle on Inferno has been set aside for them (even if he always imagined pictured as a there's a special place in Hell for me, it's called the throne sort of guy), because maybe that means he's actually putting thought into whatever this thing is they have between them. One of the perks of his Deku-induced character development is that Todoroki's now a lot more honest with himself, emotionally open, less inclined to turn a blind eye and get caught up in his own damage - the downside to which is that now he's thinking way too hard about his relationship with his boyfriend. Little questions like where this is all going, how much of a Sinner he might actually become, and the timeless conundrum of how just because shutting his brain off everytime they're together feels good doesn't mean it's necessarily good for him in the long run.
Thankfully, Bakugou can always be counted on to clear his mind at times like these, even if it means manhandling and grinding his face into the floor. Even if it means that hand on his ass, the straight and simple yelp that follows, and how utterly aghast Todoroki feels when, starved as oxygen as he is, what little capacity for reason proves enough to figure out what's going on here. It's like the final nail in the coffin when it comes to proving that Bakugou needs more help than he could ever hope to provide, particularly when one particularly rough squeeze of that stress ball Todoroki calls an ass cheek leads to, well... blood flowing to places it most definitely shouldn't be. His mind says no but his body says yes, that sort of thing - except that hand on his neck means his body is also saying no, flailing to be able to breathe again, but as it turns out the distinction between pushing Bakugou back and pushing back against Bakugou is exceptionally thin. ]
Katsuki...
[ Just like how there's very little difference between cussing Bakugou out and choking on his own in terms of sound, apparently, makes it rather difficult to say much of anything intelligible. Which means he's left here, slowly losing the ability to breathe, stuck with a guy groping his butt and grinding against the carpet to build up friction.
He has a conscience somewhere too, you know. Sounds vaguely like his mother, probably why he hasn't seen it in so long. ]
[ True, if Bakugou is going to end up in hell, he probably would want to just go the full length and say "I'm the new king around this joint!!" It's probably pretty hot and fiery in hell and all, so his gross sweaty self would have a natural advantage.
If one listens very, very carefully, they might be able to hear the sound of Bakugou's resolve go completely to pieces at hearing his own name. That is something that he's going to strain to commit to excruciating detail in his memory, because upon hearing it something in his head goes "oh" and then "ohhh" and finally "oh fuck" because he is, indeed, so fucked. His heart goes absolutely crazy and his instincts plunge into utter confusion until he has many four-lettered verbs starting with "ki-" in mind but no idea how to end the word, like some sort of screwed-up crossword puzzle where he is desperate to just slam something in there and hope everything fits when the pieces come together.
This is not the sort of teenage dream most kiddos are supposed to have, huh.
In his head, this feels like a very protracted realization; in reality, the adrenaline rush has just fooled him into thinking three seconds is three minutes. He's broken from his mental state by remembering he's got a hard-on that demands attention and temporarily liberates Todoroki's throat again, banking on the idea that probably Todoroki is finding it generally difficult to string his words coherently enough to form sentences to inform him how fucked-up this all is to go onto the more pressing task of liberating his dick from his pants.
— which is when he remembers in the back of his head that one time that he pissed on Todoroki and Todoroki got off on it, and so an inquiring mind such as his demands knowledge as to whether he's the only one into this. There are probably much sexier, attractive ways of checking "does my boyfriend have a hard-on?" than sticking a hand between his thighs and groping upward from there, but Bakugou is thinking impressively very little about making getting off a sexy sort of thing at the moment. ]
[ What confidence it inspires, that Bakugou has their future all planned out for them. Vaguely romantic, too, if the thought of living through hell together can be considered close to romance. Todoroki has both the requisite trauma and steady supply of flames to keep himself going until Bakugou inevitably tries knocking on the pearly gates.
As he feels that grip on his neck finally ease off, sucks in a breath that manages to both fill his lungs and sear his throat, Todoroki has to wonder why this keeps happening, why he keeps letting Bakugou get away with treating him like this. He's not the person he was only a few days ago, improved leaps and bounds with regards to self-respect, and yet it seems he can't get away from having Bakugou degrade him every once in a while, the scuffles and struggles he keeps brushing aside and forgiving him for. It's uncomplicated, he supposes, maybe worth thinking about. Like wondering when exactly ki- could lead into anything but kick your ass. Word jumbles were always more his style anyway.
But they're not exactly like other teenagers. Theirs is a special sort of romance, twisted and strange and a fucking pain in the ass to make sense of, the kind that'd fit quite neatly in a Kojima storyline (and look, their song is playing).
But yes, back to more pertinent matters, like the ongoing struggle to tell Bakugou just how much of a fucking asshole he thinks he is right now. Todoroki has half a mind to throw him off and storm out of here, never help the guy get off again, except as it's turning out half a mind isn't much help when he has the whole of Bakugou's body holding him down. Means he's stuck taking in every breath he can and still struggling to break free until he feels that hand between his legs and everything just stops, a change of pace that's dizzying and has his head ringing in his ears.
Because as it turns out, an oxygen-starved brain struggles with anything more complex than Feels good → Not dying anymore → Fuck yeah!!, what little air he has left lost in a gasp as he bucks into the other boy's grip, face far more flushed than it has any right to be when Bakugou discovers that he is, indeed, real fucking hard right now.
@god why ]
( i knew you were trouble when you walked in [so shame on me] )
[ The steps between "this happening" and "we croak it" are things Bakugou has yet to consider, but he's got them down for the afterlife, which might be sooner rather than later at this rate. Will they graduate high school, or accidentally perish in a kinky, kinky accident before that day can come? Stay tuned for more.
Thinking about the relationship dynamics here might, in fact, be very useful for the both of them in unpacking the ways in which they probably need a therapist's assistance, such as "You are probably a raging asshole to your boyfriend because you're amazingly insecure, Katsuki." Or "your constant need to assert dominance appears to stem from a superiority-inferiority complex of incredible degree." Bakugou getting stepped on might be doing more to help him with that than any sort of therapist could, though, so — it is what it is, basically.
Bakugou's mind is still in a sort of primal state when he realizes that ah yes, that is definitely and unambiguously a hard-on; he's not really thinking actively so much as he is just allowing his instincts to rule his actions. Not that he has much of a moral compass (and the extent to which he listens to his voice of conscience has been previously covered), but he does seem to usually have the bare modicum of self-awareness necessary to stop himself from doing something he might regret for a year or five or ten. RIP Bakugou's superego, never to recover from Todoroki simultaneously choking and saying his name, the straw that broke the camel's back. We barely knew ye.
He lets go, but only to turn Todoroki over so he's lying on his back; there's a question of accessibility here, after all, even if it does mean that they are now face-to-face. Bakugou's expression is particularly wild-eyed, even for him, and he looks so high alert that any small impetus could set him off, and behind it a measured amount of fear of — something. He isn't sure, but probably when he stops losing his damn mind he'll think about it more.
If Todoroki was hoping that this lack of Bakugou's hands actively around his neck was going to help with the "breathing normally" thing, he might be disappointed that Bakugou picks now of all times to initiate a good old teenage sloppy makeout with all the finesse of a hyena tearing into a carcass and enough pressure that one or both of them are going to be left with bruised lips. One cannot even generously call this "really bad Frenching", it's basically just Bakugou shoving his tongue into Todoroki's mouth and exploring whether it's physically possible to also shove his tongue down Todoroki's throat.
It's a happy(?) happenstance that Bakugou has to lean in for this, because it leaves their torsos pressed against each other such that any movement down there goes straight to his dick. It's friction that might be uncomfortable were it not for the heavy flow of adrenaline to dull those pesky pain receptors.
[ On reflection this plan predicates pretty heavily on them both managing to make it into some sort of afterlife, and given all the sins they've wracked up and the karma incurred and how the universe just loves to shit on them both, that probably counts as a flaw; Todoroki has had enough of Bakugou in his life without getting dragged into some reincarnation romance shit, finding and falling for each other again and again and that whole shebang.
Sitting Bakugou down with a psychologist might honestly be worth it just for the faces he'd make as some guy with a degree took him apart - it's all fun and games until the conversation turns to now, Shouto, why don't you tell us a bit about your father? What follows is an insistence that his daddy issues are resolved and thus not issues at all and anyway Bakugou's the one who needs help until he storms out and in short that is the tale of how Todoroki stopped them both from getting the therapy they both so desperately need. Beside, Bakugou's beat the shit out of each other policy actually seems to be working out and, much as he hates being roped into being the guy's therapist, he'd rather the jump from ardent sinner to apparent moral support over the alternatives.
Alternatives like holy shit it's a miracle his spine doesn't snap in half when his back hits the floor there, lucky that the word snuff is on precisely no-one's kinklist here. The gasp as he's turned over is purely one of shock, half-lidded and hazy eyes that fix upon Bakugou more the product of suffocation than any intended come hither expression, but he rather doubts Bakugou has it in him to tell the difference (then again, this is Bakugou he's dealing with, the whole matter of whether he lives or dies resting in the palm of his hand might actually be a turn-on for the guy).
Which, paired with the reference to Freud, leads into thoughts of Eros and Thanatos, death drive and pleasure principle. How quickly Todoroki goes from fighting for his life to rolling his hips against Bakugou, groaning into the kiss and shifting into trying to pretty much eat his face off - an oxygen-starved brain is strapped for space, it seems, Todoroki's mind not equipped to handle pain and pleasure all at once and finding the contrast all the more agreeable. Or maybe the great revelation is that he's an even greater masochist than he'd ever imagined, makes him worry for the day when one of them is gonna have to say please don't fuck my corpse - or worse, the day when one of them doesn't have to say it.
What matters is that Bakugou's mouth is on his own and Todoroki's body is going wild, nerves flaring at every point of contact until he's biting at his boyfriend's bottom lip and wrapping his arms around his torso to hold him in place, nails curling in to claw at his back - like Satan clawing his way back up to Paradise, albeit without the pride though there's certainly been a fall.
This feels good, he can complain later. There will be a ten page double-sided thesis on why this is bullshit on Bakugou's desk tomorrow, make no mistake. ]
[ Todoroki doesn't want to be reborn as some kind of prince and Bakugou as the blood knight of the kingdom? Or maybe some sort of Romeo and Juliet type deal? No? Really? Yeah, that would sound kind of horrifying to Bakugou too, although being in hell together for all eternity would make them both aware of it while reincarnation at least gives a leeway for a good decade and a half of blissful ignorance to each others' existences every cycle.
We interrupt this tag for a draft of a brilliant one-actor play that will soon make it big on the theatre circuit, we are sure. Just award this a Tony right now.
Me: did I lose all my fucks to give about being judged and put snuff on my kinklist? Me: (opens a new tab, checks my kinklist) Me: I guess I never had enough fucks about being judged for my fictional smut preferences. Well, let's close this tab. Alright. Mmhm. (laughs awkwardly)
Anyway, hopefully a conversation involving the phrase please don't fuck my corpse never comes to pass, because one of the possible responses is probably an awkward pause followed by, what if I didn't realize I was becoming a corpse fucker and all the awkwardness that conversation would generally entail.
Bakugou would probably be weirdly flattered by the effort to document how much of an asshole he is, really, Todoroki might find pages of it pinned to his wall with his favorite parts highlighted. The nice thing about being Bakugou is that he kind of LOVES attention of any and all sorts, so he can fuck around the circumstances of that paper coming to be until he's more flattered by it than anything else.
As long as they're, like, still in the dating-not-talking-about-it arrangement that they've fallen into, and it sort of kind of in a very vague sense occurs to him that might be why he's feeling compelled by a mild to moderate sense of uncomfortable desperation here. This is, objectively speaking, kind of a huge fuck-up. He literally just choked his boyfriend out and now wants to get off on it, is currently engaging in a round of frottage that would make a hump-happy dog feel a pang of shame. He's totally given up on the idea of supporting his weight on his own properly, using his hands instead for the nobler task of grasping at Todoroki's face, fingers tangling into his hair as he continues to give into base desire.
It feels like it takes a really long time to peak — the truth is probably that it takes an embarrassingly short amount of time for Bakugou to blow his load, and it feels almost exhausting as climax hits him in waves, leaving him strangely drained and weak in the limbs, as if orgasm has wiped out whatever combination of instinct and hardwired drive within him that convinced him this seems like a logical train of events to unfold. Probably it's the happy hormones flooding over the fight-or-flight hormones that scream at him: "oh fuck, I really want to either fight or run halfway across town and since I'm me, I'm sure as hell not running".
He's magnificently blank-brained for a few moments, mind all white and fuzzy as he slides back, finally giving Todoroki's poor mouth a break from the sheer amount of abuse it just suffered thanks to Bakugou. However, he does not give Todoroki's pride as a human being a break from the sheer amount of whatever the hell this is as he promptly begins using Todoroki like some kind of full-body pillow. It's not really all that comfortable, even, and he's pretty much banking on the idea that Todoroki isn't in the right state to roll him over while he's vulnerable and make good on that whole come at me like you want to kill me thing.
That would be. Unfortunate. Though he kind of sort of really deserves it. ]
Edited (my gang nickname is "typo monster") 2015-11-01 00:23 (UTC)
[ He'd much prefer to be born as the prince to some great utopia while Bakugou becomes a scullery maid, their two paths never again to cross. Except on reflection he'd like to avoid all the issues that come with being an heir and a father's expectations in his next life, so Bakugou can take the throne and Todoroki will make himself comfortable as a fisherman or something. Nevermind that Bakugou the blood knight drawing him in with his brutality and sheer disregard for etiquette is actually startlingly plausible.
Because that's how it is with Bakugou, isn't it. He's something foreign, an outlier after what should've been a carefully-crafted childhood to birth the next number one, a natural-born genius faced with what comes after rolling the genetic lottery who-knows how many times just to forge the right materials - and for all the horrors of his home life and how the atmosphere in that house wraps tight like a noose round his neck, Bakugou is the first time he's seen brutality on such a scale. Which is to say that he's a crass and insensitive piece of shit, but after a house full of help and a father he hardly ever sees, that's actually kinda refreshing.
Kinda captivating too, alluring in the way all things unusual are. Like watching an animal at the zoo and wondering what it'd be like outside those bars (the side of Bakugou he sees is, in truth, not that different from the one everyone else sees, but it is his all the same and that certainly means something). Bakugou is wild and just a tad primal in how he treats him, despicably base if the marks burned into his neck are indication, and yet Todoroki can't help but find it thrilling all the same. Because Bakugou is a poison that's made Todoroki want to gulp him down, tear his body to shreds upon the barbed wire that is his very presence, or something.
He also wants to flatter him and pay attention to him all day long just to see him puff up with pride and that is definitely alarming.
And now that we've confirmed that all involved parties are shameless as hell and just brimming with sin, let's get back in the swing of things! Content in the knowledge that impromptu snuff and corpse-fucking may well be in the cards.
This presumably will come after Bakugou stops using him as little more than something to get off with, grinding and thrashing and flailing against him to build up friction they're both craving for, as even struggling for air Todoroki keeps his mouth locked tight on Bakugou's, gasping for him - while still his nails dig tight into Bakugou's skin, dug deep 'til he swears he can feel blood trailing down his fingertips. Might also be his consciousness slipping. Bakugou kisses him and it feels like a fist and while it feels amazing and shit, sensation that fills him up to the core and drowns out all else it's also just way too much for him to handle Coming to a head when he feels Bakugou go slack against him, feels the other boy blow his load over him and it's that which finally pushes him over the edge. If he had even half a mind left, Todoroki might find it in himself to be embarrassed over little things like coming in sync or just how little time it takes for him to finish. He comes with a sob against his boyfriend's lips and falls a boneless mess with aching limbs and bruised lips back upon the floor.
And then a minute later aims at his head a punch that turns into a tap and sighs. ]
[ So about that. Anyway, who'd let the ruler of the country abdicate so a total asshole like Bakugou could take the lead, but hey, maybe he'd be surprisingly good at it. "I don't want to be king, I want to be a fucking conqueror," he says before going off to take over all the neighboring lands. Equally as good: him doing this but on behalf of the country and crown, except even more viciously because when you do it for something other than yourself, it's passionate and stuff, right?
He probably deserves to be punched in the head, and then some. He's unusually conscious of how different Todoroki sounds from his usual voice — rougher, more raw — and the awareness of cause-and-effect at play. For once, he must admit: yes, he deserved that, and in fact he probably deserves much worse because honestly what the fuck. It felt good at the time, felt great at the time because he wasn't thinking of anything else at the time, and therein lies the problem. He wasn't thinking. And consequences — what are those.
For a few moments, he just silently contemplates this, and then decides fuck it because he's already gone and done all of this, so he may as well just own up to it and face the music. First step: not continuing to use Todoroki as his personal cushion. Bakugou sits himself up slowly, off to the side slightly so he's not continuing to park his sorry butt on top of Todoroki.
That's the easy part, though. It's figuring out what he wants to do from this point on that gets difficult fast.
He makes a noise full of pathos and confusion and manpain, and then sighs sharply, and then very carefully reaches to grab Todoroki by the shoulders and sit him up too. He's not sure what the aftercare procedure for choking is, maybe it's better to actually leave him lying, but hell if he knows. There's a weird mixture of feelings that he's feeling when he looks at Todoroki, for that matter, some sort of unfortunate cocktail of pride (at the thoroughness of the mauling that just happened, the marks that will take time to fade) and awareness that from an objective standpoint, what he's done is totally fucked up.
There are plenty of stupid things he could say at this point, like "oh are you alright?" or "haha guess I win" or maybe "well I'm glad at least both of us came". Bakugou feels a lot like he's just choosing the least stupid reply, honestly, and he does not like that.
(He could also apologize, but that doesn't even register to him, as an option.) ]
... So.
[ So indeed. ]
You can punch me in the face again when you're more up to it.
[ Fandom really is too kind... Not that Todoroki would particularly care or anything, sending the nation's bravest and most formidable dread knight off to foreign lands to fight in his name. Waiting and praying for him to make it back alive, making it clear that Bakugou isn't allowed to die on him, keeping his feelings under wrap for fear of the inevitable succession crisis that would ensue should his father the king ever discover them. Sounds a lot like hard work, honestly. So instead consider: Prince and protector eloping together.
Bakugou deserves far more than Todoroki could ever provide, laid prone as he is now. His breath still comes in waves, heaves and uneven gulping as an impaired throat tries to gulp down what air it can, as if the splotches of red on his skin and the half-crescent moons where Bakugou's nails have dug in deep do not deter him at all. Like his spine doesn't feel close to snapping from being forced into the floor and in turn turned over in no short order. Todoroki's body does not so much hurt as it aches, honestly even worse. Real pain at least comes with a rush of adrenaline, the sound of blood singing in his ears that kept him going through that fight, now tapering off by the second to leave him with nothing but come pooling between his legs.
He's grateful to be a bodypillow no longer though. Or he would be, if he wasn't like 90% the sight of his bruised and battered body wasn't another one for the wank bank. Bakugou tries to sit him up and Todoroki has half a mind to try and clock him round the face, would give it a shot if his limbs didn't immediately scream out in protest at the very thought.
This is his boyfriend, he realises. The guy who looks like he's trying real hard not to say something fucking stupid (a suspicion Bakugou is about to confirm in, like, five seconds, but at least it's not something really dumb like Cloud making it into Smash or asking which of one of them is gonna be voiced by Okamoto/Ohsaka) is the guy he's crushing on. Even though there's absolutely nothing about him worth liking - or perhaps, it's his complete and utter lack of likeable traits which makes him likeable, a statement so pointlessly self-contradictory it could fit in the pages of a Nisio Isin novel.
What did he do to deserve taste like this. ]
I want to lie down. On a bed.
[ Addendum just in case Bakugou thought he actually wanted to end up on the floor again. The lack of an apology doesn't even surprise him, is almost comfortingly familiar, as Todoroki weakly raises one hand and sets a flame to form between his fingers - not bright enough to burn but fierce enough to make a point. ]
Carry me.
[ Todoroki's pretty sure he can walk on his own. He just doesn't want to. ]
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( 'cause baby you're a firework )
Which brings us to the issue at hand, the sports festival. He'd known from the minute they were up on the platform, eyes the world over on them while Bakugou thrashed like an upset puppy, that this couldn't possibly end well. He'd lose his cool, scream himself hoarse over him throwing the match and, in the worst-case scenario, this sham of a relationship they have going on might even be at an end. Chilling stuff, I'm sure you'll agree. But, whatever, he'd prepared himself for the worst, made his peace with whatever heroes worship, and settled down for whatever Bakugou might dish out. So, naturally, one can imagine Todoroki's surprise when... well, nothing happened. Sure, Bakugou might've been a tad more aggressive than the norm (outlandish as that sounds) when they got home that night, but in the end it all amounted to a big fat load of nothing.
Not that Todoroki was about to complain, of course; he wasn't exactly in the best of places emotionally after that fight, didn't have it in him to offer Bakugou anything close to an explanation, and so if he wanted to let the matter drop, Todoroki was more than okay with that. Except of course this is Bakugou and letting the matter drop is completely alien to everything he is. He's not going to buy any crap about character development either; he's become painfully familiar with the other boy since this whole mess started, despite his best efforts to the contrary, knows all too well by now that Bakugou doesn't need an excuse to lose his shit, has as many triggers to his temper as there are definitions of the word jigger. The source of his worry, then, because suddenly Bakugou was breaking away from his understanding of him, breaking the routine they've set up, and now the issue of waking up with a knife in his gut became a serious concern.
So, sad as it sounds, he's actually quite happy when Bakugou decides to call him out in the middle of the school day, means he can finally stop fretting over where the hell this is going. Nor does the whole mention of killing each other really faze him, because some part of Todoroki is in fact painfully aware of how close they've both come to dying lately, just as another, distinctly-larger part of him is totally okay with that. Bakugou's still a fucking idiot for coming up with the idea of course but, well. In other news, people die when they are killed, and when people use their legs they move faster!
Meaning, yes, he lets himself be dragged along, not entirely sure where this is leading but already knowing it'll be nowhere good. He could try to escape, of course, is pretty sure he can get away without a scratch, but the fact of the matter is that he wants whatever issue has Bakugou ass-angry this time off the table so they can go back to how things were before, uncomplicated. Which means folding his arms at that question, wondering how he can possibly respond. ]
You're serious, aren't you.
[ Of course he is. His consent was probably never even part of the equation, for that matter. No, they're just going to beat the shit out of each other for no apparent reason to sate Bakugou's inflated sense of pride. Possibly because, that's right, he's in a relationship with a guy who's gay and a sadist!
My dumbass boyfriend can't possibly be this weird. ]
And if one of us ends up dead?
( got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire )
[ Yeah, as if Bakugou thought it through that far. Is it that surprising, though, when Bakugou would probably describe his type as "somebody who could possibly beat the shit outta me if they really wanted to and I was not prepared", as if that's a normal preference which you could put on a Tinder profile without getting a left swipe from 100% of people. ]
And yes, of course I'm serious. [ He seems mildly offended this is in question here, although he's pretty sure this is more of a "do I have to" type complaint anyway. ] You can't call winning against somebody who's half-assing it an actual victory.
[ Thus the need for them to wail on each other until Bakugou is satisfied. To be fair, this has nothing to do with their weird relationship status, Bakugou can compartmentalize that much to an acceptable degree, and even he could sense that there were other things going on at that moment. (Maybe he thought that saying "Look, I literally don't give a shit about your circumstances" was going to help mitigate the circumstances somewhat. In a shocking twist, it did not.) The problem here is what are words and how do you communicate; also, why is it not acceptable to engage in a bit of fisticuffs to prove physical superiority?
Basically, Bakugou has never felt the need to bring up or into the dynamic they have established anything that has more than one degree of separation from the both of them. Todoroki's family-based emotional problems? That is a whole two degrees, sir. It'd be different, maybe, if Todoroki brought it up himself — he'd probably listen to it, stare really hard at the wall behind Todoroki's head, and then attempt to communicate that he honestly doesn't give a shit about the behind-the-scenes fuckery but he does, in a roundabout way, give a shit about the fact that it affects Todoroki. What a great partner; nominate Bakugou Katsuki for boyfriend of the year 2k15. ]
I didn't earn it. That's all.
[ He has no idea if he's even remotely getting his point through but whatever, he's dropping his stuff on the floor and stalking off to his room to change clothes. If he's going to die or kill somebody, it might be a bit of a hit to Yuuei's reputation if he does it in their school uniform, and more importantly, he may as well be comfy as they do this battle royale thing. ]
( legendary lovers, we could be legendary )
Truly they are a match made in heaven. ]
I give, you win. Happy now?
[ Todoroki, unfortunately, does not see the appeal in a quick spot of recreational violence - but all the same, he can appreciate that Bakugou has a problem, seemingly inconsequential as it is, and that Bakugou's problems, much as he'd prefer it were not the case, are it is in turn his problems. He enjoys the informality their relationship, how the leave their issues to one side (even if Todoroki is relatively certain that his boyfriend, he with all the capacity for empathy of a teaspoon, doesn't have issues to speak of anyway), and so he'd really like to avoid this, much as he knows that's a bad idea. He can't bring himself to admit that he might, in fact, care about Bakugou to a far greater extent than he actually shows, but he can admit to being emotionally invested in their relationship, and so things that concern Bakugou by part and parcel concern him.
They're both fucking masters at being obtuse, basically. But it means he's not saying no. ]
I'm not seeing what I get out of this.
[ Even if he is, in fact, following the other boy to his room, doesn't give a damn about what Bakugou might think as he throws off his blazer. There's an unspoken agreement being proposed here, the acknowledgement that, if he's going to provide Bakugou with the bloodbath he so desperately desires, Bakugou should in turn try to attend to his needs. Most couples would be able to just sit down and, y'know, talk about these things, but communication was never their strong suit. ]
( coming at you like a dark horse )
No, I'm not! That's even worse!!
[ What do you get out of this? Well,(yamaguchi voice) what more do you need than pride??
Wrong series reference aside, Bakugou seems legitimately pretty upset about that response. There's something more to it than just him not getting his requisite amount of blood and bruises, but a superiority-inferiority complex gone to hilariously horrible extremes. Not nearly as bad as the superiority-inferiority complex that poor Midoriya "I swear I wasn't hiding my OPness from you for years" Izuku accidentally gives Bakugou, but still, bad enough that Todoroki staking Midoriya out as a rival makes Bakugou decide he needs to obnoxiously insert himself in there to remind everybody that heyho, the King of Explodokills is pretty awesome too and are you looking down on me you piece of shit? You're looking down on me, aren't you?!
But again, haha, communication, etc. — Bakugou has done 200% better of a job articulating his feelings about this to Todoroki than he has to anybody else, and he's still making a shitshow of it. ]
Look. It's, like... different, okay? When I'm looking at you as an opponent, it's not like how I normally am looking at you.
[ Oh god he tried, he did try. He tried to hard to say "you're still my boyfriend and I still
loliloveLIKE YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT". ]Also, if you don't do anything, I'm gonna punch you in the face in five seconds.
[ HE DID TRY. ]
( you are the weapon i chose, these wounds are self-inflicted )
Also this would of course be followed by You're really cool, Bakugou and the question marks they would be everywhere.
It probably says a lot for the nature of their relationship that Todoroki is not in the least bit concerned to find himself pressed up against a wall, staring Bakugou down - this is how 90% of their romantic encounters go, he'd have to adjust eventually.
Also he's not touched by that sentiment at all, shut up. ]
I'm not going to pretend I understand.
[ So instead he's just going to grab both of Bakugou's shoulders, make like he's about to kiss him, and crash their foreheads together.
#winning ]
( infect me with your love and fill me with your poison )
Anyway, he's not going to admit that he was taken slightly off-guard by how familiar that gesture is, but he definitely takes a moment longer than he really should've required to react. Luckily for him, Bakugou is naturally hard-headed, so he largely just winces and makes an attempt to throw Todoroki's hold so he can back off to a safer distance to regroup. He just got nailed in the forehead. He looks really pleased. ]
See, that's more like it.
[ So change of plans, now they're just going to go hand-to-hand in Bakugou's house and hopefully there isn't anything particularly valuable or sentimental that could become collateral damage. Why would Bakugou care about his dear old grandma's heirloom when he needs to concentrate on making good on his promise to punch Todoroki in the face instead? Because he's a grade-A violent person with personal issues, the fact that they're in a relationship they don't explicitly discuss doesn't stop him from putting his full weight into it, either. ]
( second guess every move that you make )
Though Todoroki distinctly feels that it's the other way around, because Bakugou looks far too happy with himself after that blow, like a pleased cat, and so the throbbing pain that's broken out across his forehead feels very much not worth it. ]
Let's just get this over with.
[ Easier said than done, because Todoroki was never one for CQC - as a certain Teenage Mutant Hero Turtle will later observe - relies pretty heavily on his quirk when it comes to combat, meaning the arm he raises to block that punch doesn't shield him from much of the blow, throws him back. And this is why, head ringing, his immediate response is to try and return the favour. ]
( are you brave enough to let me see your peacock )
There's no response to Todoroki's comment; the adrenaline's already rushing and he's mentally in the zone (no laser eyes, though), not wanting to waste his breath on trading snarky remarks at the moment. Even Bakugou has enough in him to realize that it is definitely highly abnormal, the extent to which this sort of thing excites him, how strongly it is that this is driven by instinct.
If Bakugou had stopped to think about his plan, he probably would've realized at some point that he picked one that advantages him without particularly meaning to, when he's better at short ranges and relies on his (fundamentally really gross) hero costume to give him the assist at longer ranges, but it has been well established at this point that thinking was not something that went into this plan. This time, he's expecting the retaliation and shifts back to catch some of the momentum of the blow, taking the rest so that he can stay close enough to hook his foot around the back of Todoroki's ankle and attempting to sweep him off-balance. ]
( you're so gay )
But yes, one of these days Todoroki is going to realise his boyfriend basically has two giant buckets of his own sweat strapped to his arms and this will be a great tipping point for their relationship. For now, however, he's content to watch as Bakugou slips into DA ZONE, perhaps trying to ignore just how alarming being faced with that expression is. There's actually something a little captivating in it, Todoroki decides, almost pure, how he lets his bloodlust overtake him and puts all else aside.
Or that might be him making excuses for why the sight of Bakugou looking about ready to kill him where he stands is actually kinda hot.
Instead it's a matter of how there's no attempting to sweep him off-balance at this point, because Todoroki's experience with combat has never been this hands-on and besides, he's never thought about having to fight without his quirk. Which means he goes down like a ton of bricks with very little struggle at all, manages to force himself forward and throw a punch at Bakugou to try and drag him down. ]
( YOU'RE HOT THEN YOU'RE COLD YOU'RE YES THEN YOU'RE NO )
It probably goes to show just how much Bakugou should seek therapy that at this point, he's so singlemindedly focused that Todoroki manages to punch him squarely in the jaw and drag him down to the floor but he barely registers anything except the taste of blood in his mouth and a half-formed thought that he thinks he may have cut his inner cheek on his teeth. Instinctively, he rolls with the motion, uses gravity to ensure that he comes out on top and — this is kind of familiar, just in a different context of when one of them has their knees straddling the other's waist. And just in case Todoroki ever, for some reason, thought that Bakugou wasn't serious about the whole "I think attempted murder is reasonable in the course of this fight" thing, rather than settling for something tamer, like maybe grabbing at the neck of Todoroki's shirt and yanking him up, he just goes straight for the stranglehold, fingers curling around Todoroki's neck as he tries to force his chin up.
Also, he's probably like thirty seconds from becoming the subject of this question. ]
( I KISSED A )
What else is new. Bakugou is at all times like thirty seconds away from being in dire need of therapy.
More important is the feeling of Bakugou's face beneath his fist, and lucid as he is it's hard to deny the triumph that brings, a half-second of satisfaction before he finds himself falling. He might've just crashed the back of his head against the floor hard enough to earn a concussion but really, it's hard to focus on stuff like that when he finds Bakugou atop of him, fingers wrapped lovingly around his neck to make him choke. That sort of thing really does wonders for making him give up on the whole rational thinking thing, blood rushing to his head to drown all else out, makes him bring his hands to Bakugou's arms and dig nails in deep to pull him off.
Possibly also grinding up against him, he'll admit. It says a lot when the victim of child abuse from a loveless marriage is the sanest one between them. ]
( my boy, he ain't the one i saw coming ) (it counts she was featured)
One would think that a prominent hero academy would have some level of interest in having its young and brightest seek some therapy for all those issues, but what? What what?? Proper adult supervision in my shonen mangas? Get outta here. Bakugou is working out his feelings via violence, and there is nothing wrong with that, he feels.
Still, even he would have to admit that there's probably something severely wrong with the heady rush he gets from this; he can feel the blood rushing and he's hyperaware of Todoroki, even down to the smallest movements — he doesn't allow his senses to miss a thing.
He hisses a little when he feels nails digging into his skin, but he's too pumped with adrenaline to fully register the pain, so it doesn't occur to him to shake Todoroki off by moving his arms, jerking them away, nope. Right now, the logical processes in his brain are informing him that clearly, clearly the best way to get him to stop is to adjust that chokehold so that he's pressing upwards a little more, putting pressure on the softness of where the bottom of the jaw meets with the neck.
— aaaaand there we go, there's the fightboner we all knew was coming. Congratulations, Todoroki, on being choked by an asshole who pops one in the middle of a brawl. Life never really goes as expected, does it. ]
( nice legs, daisy dukes ) (this counts too)
And given that the proper adults' response to Bakugou and Midoriya's mess of a relationship was forcing them into a combat situation, he might actually be onto something there. Or at the very least, Todoroki's definitely working through something right now, feels they'll have grown as a couple by the time this is over. If he lives that long, that is.
The problem with Bakugou's hands tight around his neck and the threat of impending death hanging over him is that it makes it rather difficult to think, and so while Bakugou becomes aware of near every motion he makes, Todoroki's view is already starting to shrink, faded edges at the corner of his vision as instinct overrides all else, forces him to focus on the important things - how he's about to die here. Lack of oxygen notwithstanding, thoughts so well-planned and complex as even I'm so fucked are beyond him now, every urge in his body screaming out that most basic of edicts: Kill or be killed.
Unfortunately, he's not quite yet at Bakugou's level, the point where using his quirk becomes instinct, and so it's with a choking noise that Todoroki tries to force himself up, clawing at Bakugou's neck with one hand and aiming a punch at his face with the other, captivated by the sound of blood pounding in his ears and that primal need to bring Bakugou down.
Which also means he's, ah. Grinding up against his boyfriend right now, accidentally building up friction. Could be a little unfortunate. ]
( and wherever we go we are heroes, heroes )
Bakugou's practically ready to become a counselor now, if really all that's needed to work out intrapersonal issues is to fight it out! He can suggest ever more creative ways to beat the ever loving shit out of each other. "What doesn't kill you makes your relationship stronger or whatever," he'll say. "Oh, your arm's broken? That's too fucking bad. You should break that other guy's arm in retaliation."
The first thing that Bakugou registers is faint confusion that he can taste blood, and then he realizes that the reason his mouth is a bloody mess because he keeps ripping up the inside of his cheeks on his teeth. After that is the realization that he just got thoroughly punched in the face, with enough force to distract him from what he was doing (choking his SO to death) and loosen his grip, but not enough force that his dick remembers that hey there, little buddy! We were doing a different kind of one-on-one here!
The I want to fight instinct is really not fundamentally incompatible with the I want to get off on it? instinct to Bakugou, but he seems momentarily distracted at his priorities here. Fight first, get off second? Get off first, fight second? Por qué no los dos?
After another second or two of this intense inner debate, he both internally and externally declares: ] Oh, fuck it.
[ One is probably not supposed to get off on grabbing one's boyfriend by the shoulders and attempting to roll him over onto his stomach, knee pressing into the small of his back and rudely pressing his face face to the floor, hand half on Todoroki's cheek and partially on his neck, but as we have well established here: Bakugou's an ass man and if he's going to get off on this, he's going to do it so thoroughly that when Todoroki gives him shit for it later, he can close his eyes and think okay that's fair but it was also fucking awesome so. ]
( you can't make yourself stop dreaming )
The worst part of course is that Bakugou's half-assed methods - resorting to violence, burying his issues to then take them out on the general populace, predominately just being an abrasive asshole to everyone he meets - somehow keep bearing fruit, which on top of being goddamn infuriating, probably means he's never going to get any better. Which shouldn't really be a problem, because Todoroki's never been a big fan of that whole i can change him bullshit from his sister's romance novels (Anne and Marilla had this discussion about a century ago and it was old then), but he's seriously starting to wonder how Bakugou will actually handle adult life.
Or y'know, he would be, if not if not for the very real reminder of his own mortality staring him dead in the face. There's little room for thoughts like i think i might seriously be in love with the guy trying to choke me the fuck out in a head deprived of oxygen, funnily enough! Every bit of processing power Todoroki has is being directed into breaking free, thrashing under Bakugou and building up friction, precisely the wrong thing to do in this situation (but really, was there ever a right thing).
He doesn't get a lot of time to appreciate that loosened grip, unfortunately, manages maybe one quick gasp before Todoroki finds himself being pinned to the floor, air-starved limbs not exactly suited for putting up much of a struggle. If he was in anything approaching his right mind right now, he might actually have noticed that his boyfriend's somehow managed to pop a fucker boner during all of this when the damn thing rubs against his leg, but alas. Forgive him for not realising Bakugou's assicition was going to play into their fight to the death.
But now is not the time to be questioning Bakugou's weird preoccupation with sexualising his body (no, there's nothing at all sexual about him, not at all. what do you mean unintentionally lewd). ]
The fuck are you—
[ Todoroki gets about that far until he decides to just enjoy his newfound ability to breathe, panting perhaps just a little to heavily as he tries to angle himself off the ground, push back against Bakugou to get his face out of what's proving to be a surprisingly comfortable floor. Where the fuck is this going, Katsuki. ]
( who you're dreaming of, if it's who you love )
Bakugou never wanted to go to hell for being a lustful bastard. A prideful bastard, sure, he would have taken that and said "okay. Fair." He could even see wrath being the sin that tipped the scales. But this is a direction he never foresaw coming — if he were the type to be more inclined towards justifying these sorts of decisions, he could probably pull some cool semi-legit psychological/biological facts out like "well you know in a life or death situation your base drives kick in and remind you that your entire purpose of being alive is to procreate and so it's like totally normal to pop one in a fight" — but he's not really inclined towards that thing, for one, and more importantly he would be all too aware at the sheer amount of bullshit coming out of his mouth. Popping a boner during a fight, that's sort of justifiable. Popping a boner because he thinks his boyfriend's hot and Bakugou sexualizes the hell out of his body, that's probably just part of being a hormonal teenager. Deciding to take the opportunity to purposely seek getting off during a fight, that is...
It would take a lot of professional help for Bakugou to unpack his issues is the nice way to put it, probably.
And where the fuck is this going indeed. Bakugou makes an exceedingly strained noise at Todoroki pushing himself back against him because fuck his life, fuck his physiology, fuck everything that is making him think this is a really great idea despite the very small voice of rationality squeaking as loudly as it can THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA! STOP RIGHT THERE!! — the better conscious he thought he'd killed off years ago.
It sounds kind of like Midoriya's voice (all it's missing is a vaguely tearful kacchan!!!), which is probably why Bakugou doesn't listen and instead casually places either knee on each side of Todoroki and
touches the butt like we both knew he would. Okay, "touch" is really an understatement. "Manhandle", while more accurate, is still somewhat kind. This is like on the level of 'has this guy literally never touched a boob before, or does he think that it's going to disappear if he doesn't put his entire life force into it?' in bad straight porn.
He senses Todoroki about to give him shit despite only just regaining the ability to breathe and decides that ahahaha nah, he is not about that lifestyle today. It's not a very comfortable grip he has on Todoroki's neck, though, and consequentially there is very little finesse put into distinguishing between "enough force to make sure he can't talk" and "well, it'd be like the third or fourth or... fifth time I joked about Sex Sent Me To The ER" over the course of X many months. ]
( they don’t make ‘em like you and I )
Todoroki supposes he should be thankful that his boyfriend's sunk so much thought into which particular circle on Inferno has been set aside for them (even if he always imagined pictured as a there's a special place in Hell for me, it's called the throne sort of guy), because maybe that means he's actually putting thought into whatever this thing is they have between them. One of the perks of his Deku-induced character development is that Todoroki's now a lot more honest with himself, emotionally open, less inclined to turn a blind eye and get caught up in his own damage - the downside to which is that now he's thinking way too hard about his relationship with his boyfriend. Little questions like where this is all going, how much of a Sinner he might actually become, and the timeless conundrum of how just because shutting his brain off everytime they're together feels good doesn't mean it's necessarily good for him in the long run.
Thankfully, Bakugou can always be counted on to clear his mind at times like these, even if it means manhandling and grinding his face into the floor. Even if it means that hand on his ass, the straight and simple yelp that follows, and how utterly aghast Todoroki feels when, starved as oxygen as he is, what little capacity for reason proves enough to figure out what's going on here. It's like the final nail in the coffin when it comes to proving that Bakugou needs more help than he could ever hope to provide, particularly when one particularly rough squeeze of that stress ball Todoroki calls an ass cheek leads to, well... blood flowing to places it most definitely shouldn't be. His mind says no but his body says yes, that sort of thing - except that hand on his neck means his body is also saying no, flailing to be able to breathe again, but as it turns out the distinction between pushing Bakugou back and pushing back against Bakugou is exceptionally thin. ]
Katsuki...
[ Just like how there's very little difference between cussing Bakugou out and choking on his own in terms of sound, apparently, makes it rather difficult to say much of anything intelligible. Which means he's left here, slowly losing the ability to breathe, stuck with a guy groping his butt and grinding against the carpet to build up friction.
He has a conscience somewhere too, you know. Sounds vaguely like his mother, probably why he hasn't seen it in so long. ]
( we could go down in flames )
If one listens very, very carefully, they might be able to hear the sound of Bakugou's resolve go completely to pieces at hearing his own name. That is something that he's going to strain to commit to excruciating detail in his memory, because upon hearing it something in his head goes "oh" and then "ohhh" and finally "oh fuck" because he is, indeed, so fucked. His heart goes absolutely crazy and his instincts plunge into utter confusion until he has many four-lettered verbs starting with "ki-" in mind but no idea how to end the word, like some sort of screwed-up crossword puzzle where he is desperate to just slam something in there and hope everything fits when the pieces come together.
This is not the sort of teenage dream most kiddos are supposed to have, huh.
In his head, this feels like a very protracted realization; in reality, the adrenaline rush has just fooled him into thinking three seconds is three minutes. He's broken from his mental state by remembering he's got a hard-on that demands attention and temporarily liberates Todoroki's throat again, banking on the idea that probably Todoroki is finding it generally difficult to string his words coherently enough to form sentences to inform him how fucked-up this all is to go onto the more pressing task of liberating his dick from his pants.
— which is when he remembers in the back of his head that one time that he pissed on Todoroki and Todoroki got off on it, and so an inquiring mind such as his demands knowledge as to whether he's the only one into this. There are probably much sexier, attractive ways of checking "does my boyfriend have a hard-on?" than sticking a hand between his thighs and groping upward from there, but Bakugou is thinking impressively very little about making getting off a sexy sort of thing at the moment. ]
( these kinda wounds they last and they last )
As he feels that grip on his neck finally ease off, sucks in a breath that manages to both fill his lungs and sear his throat, Todoroki has to wonder why this keeps happening, why he keeps letting Bakugou get away with treating him like this. He's not the person he was only a few days ago, improved leaps and bounds with regards to self-respect, and yet it seems he can't get away from having Bakugou degrade him every once in a while, the scuffles and struggles he keeps brushing aside and forgiving him for. It's uncomplicated, he supposes, maybe worth thinking about. Like wondering when exactly ki- could lead into anything but kick your ass. Word jumbles were always more his style anyway.
But they're not exactly like other teenagers. Theirs is a special sort of romance, twisted and strange and a fucking pain in the ass to make sense of, the kind that'd fit quite neatly in a Kojima storyline (and look, their song is playing).
But yes, back to more pertinent matters, like the ongoing struggle to tell Bakugou just how much of a fucking asshole he thinks he is right now. Todoroki has half a mind to throw him off and storm out of here, never help the guy get off again, except as it's turning out half a mind isn't much help when he has the whole of Bakugou's body holding him down. Means he's stuck taking in every breath he can and still struggling to break free until he feels that hand between his legs and everything just stops, a change of pace that's dizzying and has his head ringing in his ears.
Because as it turns out, an oxygen-starved brain struggles with anything more complex than Feels good → Not dying anymore → Fuck yeah!!, what little air he has left lost in a gasp as he bucks into the other boy's grip, face far more flushed than it has any right to be when Bakugou discovers that he is, indeed, real fucking hard right now.
@god why ]
( i knew you were trouble when you walked in [so shame on me] )
Thinking about the relationship dynamics here might, in fact, be very useful for the both of them in unpacking the ways in which they probably need a therapist's assistance, such as "You are probably a raging asshole to your boyfriend because you're amazingly insecure, Katsuki." Or "your constant need to assert dominance appears to stem from a superiority-inferiority complex of incredible degree." Bakugou getting stepped on might be doing more to help him with that than any sort of therapist could, though, so — it is what it is, basically.
Bakugou's mind is still in a sort of primal state when he realizes that ah yes, that is definitely and unambiguously a hard-on; he's not really thinking actively so much as he is just allowing his instincts to rule his actions. Not that he has much of a moral compass (and the extent to which he listens to his voice of conscience has been previously covered), but he does seem to usually have the bare modicum of self-awareness necessary to stop himself from doing something he might regret for a year or five or ten. RIP Bakugou's superego, never to recover from Todoroki simultaneously choking and saying his name, the straw that broke the camel's back. We barely knew ye.
He lets go, but only to turn Todoroki over so he's lying on his back; there's a question of accessibility here, after all, even if it does mean that they are now face-to-face. Bakugou's expression is particularly wild-eyed, even for him, and he looks so high alert that any small impetus could set him off, and behind it a measured amount of fear of — something. He isn't sure, but probably when he stops losing his damn mind he'll think about it more.
If Todoroki was hoping that this lack of Bakugou's hands actively around his neck was going to help with the "breathing normally" thing, he might be disappointed that Bakugou picks now of all times to initiate a good old teenage sloppy makeout with all the finesse of a hyena tearing into a carcass and enough pressure that one or both of them are going to be left with bruised lips. One cannot even generously call this "really bad Frenching", it's basically just Bakugou shoving his tongue into Todoroki's mouth and exploring whether it's physically possible to also shove his tongue down Todoroki's throat.
It's a happy(?) happenstance that Bakugou has to lean in for this, because it leaves their torsos pressed against each other such that any movement down there goes straight to his dick. It's friction that might be uncomfortable were it not for the heavy flow of adrenaline to dull those pesky pain receptors.
god @ both of them: blocked ]
( we are NEVER EVER EVER getting back together )
Sitting Bakugou down with a psychologist might honestly be worth it just for the faces he'd make as some guy with a degree took him apart - it's all fun and games until the conversation turns to now, Shouto, why don't you tell us a bit about your father? What follows is an insistence that his daddy issues are resolved and thus not issues at all and anyway Bakugou's the one who needs help until he storms out and in short that is the tale of how Todoroki stopped them both from getting the therapy they both so desperately need. Beside, Bakugou's beat the shit out of each other policy actually seems to be working out and, much as he hates being roped into being the guy's therapist, he'd rather the jump from ardent sinner to apparent moral support over the alternatives.
Alternatives like holy shit it's a miracle his spine doesn't snap in half when his back hits the floor there, lucky that the word snuff is on precisely no-one's kinklist here. The gasp as he's turned over is purely one of shock, half-lidded and hazy eyes that fix upon Bakugou more the product of suffocation than any intended come hither expression, but he rather doubts Bakugou has it in him to tell the difference (then again, this is Bakugou he's dealing with, the whole matter of whether he lives or dies resting in the palm of his hand might actually be a turn-on for the guy).
Which, paired with the reference to Freud, leads into thoughts of Eros and Thanatos, death drive and pleasure principle. How quickly Todoroki goes from fighting for his life to rolling his hips against Bakugou, groaning into the kiss and shifting into trying to pretty much eat his face off - an oxygen-starved brain is strapped for space, it seems, Todoroki's mind not equipped to handle pain and pleasure all at once and finding the contrast all the more agreeable. Or maybe the great revelation is that he's an even greater masochist than he'd ever imagined, makes him worry for the day when one of them is gonna have to say please don't fuck my corpse - or worse, the day when one of them doesn't have to say it.
What matters is that Bakugou's mouth is on his own and Todoroki's body is going wild, nerves flaring at every point of contact until he's biting at his boyfriend's bottom lip and wrapping his arms around his torso to hold him in place, nails curling in to claw at his back - like Satan clawing his way back up to Paradise, albeit without the pride though there's certainly been a fall.
This feels good, he can complain later. There will be a ten page double-sided thesis on why this is bullshit on Bakugou's desk tomorrow, make no mistake. ]
( hey, now we've got problems )
We interrupt this tag for a draft of a brilliant one-actor play that will soon make it big on the theatre circuit, we are sure. Just award this a Tony right now.
Anyway, hopefully a conversation involving the phrase please don't fuck my corpse never comes to pass, because one of the possible responses is probably an awkward pause followed by, what if I didn't realize I was becoming a corpse fucker and all the awkwardness that conversation would generally entail.
Bakugou would probably be weirdly flattered by the effort to document how much of an asshole he is, really, Todoroki might find pages of it pinned to his wall with his favorite parts highlighted. The nice thing about being Bakugou is that he kind of LOVES attention of any and all sorts, so he can fuck around the circumstances of that paper coming to be until he's more flattered by it than anything else.
As long as they're, like, still in the dating-not-talking-about-it arrangement that they've fallen into, and it sort of kind of in a very vague sense occurs to him that might be why he's feeling compelled by a mild to moderate sense of uncomfortable desperation here. This is, objectively speaking, kind of a huge fuck-up. He literally just choked his boyfriend out and now wants to get off on it, is currently engaging in a round of frottage that would make a hump-happy dog feel a pang of shame. He's totally given up on the idea of supporting his weight on his own properly, using his hands instead for the nobler task of grasping at Todoroki's face, fingers tangling into his hair as he continues to give into base desire.
It feels like it takes a really long time to peak — the truth is probably that it takes an embarrassingly short amount of time for Bakugou to blow his load, and it feels almost exhausting as climax hits him in waves, leaving him strangely drained and weak in the limbs, as if orgasm has wiped out whatever combination of instinct and hardwired drive within him that convinced him this seems like a logical train of events to unfold. Probably it's the happy hormones flooding over the fight-or-flight hormones that scream at him: "oh fuck, I really want to either fight or run halfway across town and since I'm me, I'm sure as hell not running".
He's magnificently blank-brained for a few moments, mind all white and fuzzy as he slides back, finally giving Todoroki's poor mouth a break from the sheer amount of abuse it just suffered thanks to Bakugou. However, he does not give Todoroki's pride as a human being a break from the sheer amount of whatever the hell this is as he promptly begins using Todoroki like some kind of full-body pillow. It's not really all that comfortable, even, and he's pretty much banking on the idea that Todoroki isn't in the right state to roll him over while he's vulnerable and make good on that whole come at me like you want to kill me thing.
That would be. Unfortunate. Though he kind of sort of really deserves it. ]
( he's complicated, he's irrational )
Because that's how it is with Bakugou, isn't it. He's something foreign, an outlier after what should've been a carefully-crafted childhood to birth the next number one, a natural-born genius faced with what comes after rolling the genetic lottery who-knows how many times just to forge the right materials - and for all the horrors of his home life and how the atmosphere in that house wraps tight like a noose round his neck, Bakugou is the first time he's seen brutality on such a scale. Which is to say that he's a crass and insensitive piece of shit, but after a house full of help and a father he hardly ever sees, that's actually kinda refreshing.
Kinda captivating too, alluring in the way all things unusual are. Like watching an animal at the zoo and wondering what it'd be like outside those bars (the side of Bakugou he sees is, in truth, not that different from the one everyone else sees, but it is his all the same and that certainly means something). Bakugou is wild and just a tad primal in how he treats him, despicably base if the marks burned into his neck are indication, and yet Todoroki can't help but find it thrilling all the same. Because Bakugou is a poison that's made Todoroki want to gulp him down, tear his body to shreds upon the barbed wire that is his very presence, or something.
He also wants to flatter him and pay attention to him all day long just to see him puff up with pride and that is definitely alarming.
And now that we've confirmed that all involved parties are shameless as hell and just brimming with sin, let's get back in the swing of things! Content in the knowledge that impromptu snuff and corpse-fucking may well be in the cards.
This presumably will come after Bakugou stops using him as little more than something to get off with, grinding and thrashing and flailing against him to build up friction they're both craving for, as even struggling for air Todoroki keeps his mouth locked tight on Bakugou's, gasping for him - while still his nails dig tight into Bakugou's skin, dug deep 'til he swears he can feel blood trailing down his fingertips. Might also be his consciousness slipping. Bakugou kisses him and it feels like a fist and while it feels amazing and shit, sensation that fills him up to the core and drowns out all else it's also just way too much for him to handle Coming to a head when he feels Bakugou go slack against him, feels the other boy blow his load over him and it's that which finally pushes him over the edge. If he had even half a mind left, Todoroki might find it in himself to be embarrassed over little things like coming in sync or just how little time it takes for him to finish. He comes with a sob against his boyfriend's lips and falls a boneless mess with aching limbs and bruised lips back upon the floor.
And then a minute later aims at his head a punch that turns into a tap and sighs. ]
Fuck. You.
( but loving him was red )
He probably deserves to be punched in the head, and then some. He's unusually conscious of how different Todoroki sounds from his usual voice — rougher, more raw — and the awareness of cause-and-effect at play. For once, he must admit: yes, he deserved that, and in fact he probably deserves much worse because honestly what the fuck. It felt good at the time, felt great at the time because he wasn't thinking of anything else at the time, and therein lies the problem. He wasn't thinking. And consequences — what are those.
For a few moments, he just silently contemplates this, and then decides fuck it because he's already gone and done all of this, so he may as well just own up to it and face the music. First step: not continuing to use Todoroki as his personal cushion. Bakugou sits himself up slowly, off to the side slightly so he's not continuing to park his sorry butt on top of Todoroki.
That's the easy part, though. It's figuring out what he wants to do from this point on that gets difficult fast.
He makes a noise full of pathos and confusion and manpain, and then sighs sharply, and then very carefully reaches to grab Todoroki by the shoulders and sit him up too. He's not sure what the aftercare procedure for choking is, maybe it's better to actually leave him lying, but hell if he knows. There's a weird mixture of feelings that he's feeling when he looks at Todoroki, for that matter, some sort of unfortunate cocktail of pride (at the thoroughness of the mauling that just happened, the marks that will take time to fade) and awareness that from an objective standpoint, what he's done is totally fucked up.
There are plenty of stupid things he could say at this point, like "oh are you alright?" or "haha guess I win" or maybe "well I'm glad at least both of us came". Bakugou feels a lot like he's just choosing the least stupid reply, honestly, and he does not like that.
(He could also apologize, but that doesn't even register to him, as an option.) ]
... So.
[ So indeed. ]
You can punch me in the face again when you're more up to it.
[ ... Gener...ous... ]
( and I never knew I could feel that much )
Bakugou deserves far more than Todoroki could ever provide, laid prone as he is now. His breath still comes in waves, heaves and uneven gulping as an impaired throat tries to gulp down what air it can, as if the splotches of red on his skin and the half-crescent moons where Bakugou's nails have dug in deep do not deter him at all. Like his spine doesn't feel close to snapping from being forced into the floor and in turn turned over in no short order. Todoroki's body does not so much hurt as it aches, honestly even worse. Real pain at least comes with a rush of adrenaline, the sound of blood singing in his ears that kept him going through that fight, now tapering off by the second to leave him with nothing but come pooling between his legs.
He's grateful to be a bodypillow no longer though. Or he would be, if he wasn't like 90% the sight of his bruised and battered body wasn't another one for the wank bank. Bakugou tries to sit him up and Todoroki has half a mind to try and clock him round the face, would give it a shot if his limbs didn't immediately scream out in protest at the very thought.
This is his boyfriend, he realises. The guy who looks like he's trying real hard not to say something fucking stupid (a suspicion Bakugou is about to confirm in, like, five seconds, but at least it's not something really dumb like Cloud making it into Smash or asking which of one of them is gonna be voiced by Okamoto/Ohsaka) is the guy he's crushing on. Even though there's absolutely nothing about him worth liking - or perhaps, it's his complete and utter lack of likeable traits which makes him likeable, a statement so pointlessly self-contradictory it could fit in the pages of a Nisio Isin novel.
What did he do to deserve taste like this. ]
I want to lie down. On a bed.
[ Addendum just in case Bakugou thought he actually wanted to end up on the floor again. The lack of an apology doesn't even surprise him, is almost comfortingly familiar, as Todoroki weakly raises one hand and sets a flame to form between his fingers - not bright enough to burn but fierce enough to make a point. ]
Carry me.
[ Todoroki's pretty sure he can walk on his own. He just doesn't want to. ]
( you're the kind of reckless that should send me running )
( i'd be breaking all my rules to see you )
( he's so bad but he does it so well )
( all I know is that you drove us off the road )
( gimme something that'll haunt me whenever you're not around )
( it was a moment of weakness and you said "yes" )
( i need you like a heartbeat, but you know you've got a mean streak )
( all roads — they lead me here )
( magic, madness, heaven, sin )
( no proof, one touch, you felt enough )
( we were 17 and crazy, running wild, wild )
( face to face but never eye to eye )
( i should have slept with one eye open at night )
( to write on his heart in permanent marker )
( i think you're crazy 'cause i still love you baby )
( but i'd give anything to have you here today )
( what you're looking for has been here the whole time )
( and we'll tell each other things, like i love you )
( and i never saw you coming )
( love will find you one way or another )
( jump then fall into me )
( and I can't breathe without you )
( and this love came back to me )
( you are in love )
( so I cross my heart and hope for you )
( this is really happening )
( feelings being felt, fireworks in the background, flowers blooming metaphorically )
( all the right shades on the wrong page )
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